I'm the rich young man/ruler! I've many riches in this world but are unwilling to part with them for Christ sake. I see that i have no lack in any area of my life! Yes such arrogance but am i not right? what more do i need? Perhaps more knowledge and wisdom but these i will never stop seeking. what then?
I've kept the commandments like the young man, and is now seeking the way to eternal life BUT no I'm not ready to put down all my riches and simply follow! My identity have been partly build upon all these riches, and they have given me the confidence that i have. Do not be mistaken, i'm not talking about monetary riches but riches in every single area of life. who can say that i lack? Passion for the sick and those in need still burns in my heart and i've a great desire for them. Talents and attitude for success is within me, no doubt arrogant and complacent too, but with care, meticulous planning and right approach what can stop me from achieving what i want? Love is definitely something that I dont lack, there are many who regards highly of me and love me for who i am. Be it Teachers, Peers, Family, Church, Brothers and Sisters. They have so much faith in me, believing I'll do something great. I've also gain the trust of many people. Many trust, believe and have faith in me! What then do i lack? TELL ME!!!
I'm not willing to just let everything go, sacrifice everything and follow You! Cant i carry them with me while following You? I recognize you are the way but must i give it up? Must i give it all up? Why? Why give it to me in the 1st place when you want me to let go? Its so difficult! I read through my journal of my mission trip and my past posts and i wonder where have the passion that i used to have gone! The desire so deep that I was willing to give up anything to follow after you. Have I been so taken in by the world that I've conformed to the world?
Lord would you stand by and do nothing? would you not continue your work in me and let your promise come to past in my life? Lord I ask, according to your word, that you come and create in me a new heart again, one that is humble enough to submit and surrender for it is so difficult to do so. let me stop going in this cycle of believing I'm self sufficient and the arrogance that irks even myself! I'm sure you find it distasteful too so Lord, answer me and come and do something within me. From the inside out! PLEASE!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment