I was half resigning to the fate that I dont have to be touched like how everyone have been touched. Its not a feeling I'm seeking after all. I have to rest in the knowledge that He loves me. I keep telling myself but can't help finding myself still yearning for what others have received.
So we went, my brother and I.
If I can't have a touch, at least I can still get fed. And so I listen intently hoping that Pst Nathan's jokes that amuse everyone could amuse me as well. And it finally did when he played with the nodding sheep. I laughed(or rather giggled), for the 1st time in ages, from my heart. I felt released from everything that held me and I felt better. At that point I was satisfied. I enjoyed immensely what he shared with us and I absorbed it like a sponge because its something that spoke to my heart and at the same time a new and fresh thought that I've not heard before. So when Pst Nathan asked who wanted more, I was the only one who responded.
And so I was fed. Contented with what God has given to me.
Then came the exciting part. As I've mentioned I gave up the thought of getting touched, or rather I just get used to not being touched that I sort of gave up on that thought. But of course God did not forget me nor did He not hear me. He did and is doing something with my life from the inside.
And so I got what I wanted and it was really a deliverance. I released everything and I was set free. Free to be a child. The child that I am. (You may not agree with this but its the truth. If you can't accept it, YOU need to be set free.)
That Saturday was really awesome. An encounter and experience that cannot be exchanged for anything else. I praise God!
I encourage everyone who has issues to look to Him. He will eventually at His own time after He does what He wants done with you, touch you and restore you beyond what you can imagine.
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